same old, same old

Nothing unusual going on...just taking care of Matt and hoping he'll sleep through the night! Mom's coming up again on Friday, Febuary 16th, and we're all stoked! Yay!
Really, nothing is going on. But, I felt guilty for not posting! I go back to work on the 12th, and I'm actually looking forward to it. I am so sick of having no money!
Well, that's all for now. Sean is going to work soon so I was going to spend some quality time with him (playing WoW) :-P.
Okay, I'll post when something interesting happens!

BTW, here's that pic of Matt in the penguin suit:

Don't play with Mattches!

Yeah yeah, long time no post, I know! My mom came down and stayed from January 17th through the 21st and it was awesome! It's the first time in 2 years since I saw her and a lot has changed. I haven't seen her since I was a teenager! It's fascinating to see the little things I do that she does and I didn't know she did, like always leaving the last edge bite of a sandwich or burger. Or our intense dislike for sour cream/mayo (except in deviled eggs and tuna). Or that we both steal covers and sleep with one foot out.
Anyway, she was happy to see me but ecstatic to see Matt! She held him almost constantly, which was fine with me! I think of it this way--she was trying to cram in a month's worth of cuddle time in 5 days. We didn't do anything extraordinary, mostly hung around home or in Walmart. She was able to spoil me this time and she got me more bottles for Matt (he'll only drink out of one kind and we only had 3), more outfits and bibs and hats. She had brought a cute Winnie-the-Pooh diaper bag filled to the brim with cute things she had picked up here and there ever since I got pregnant. One item was a penguin suit that one of her friends gave her (for the life of me I cannot remember who she said it was--but thank you!!!). It was SO CUTE!!! He liked it a lot because it was plushy and warm and he fell asleep for a long time in it.

LAME!!!! Blogger won't let me upload pictures!!!! Well...let it just suffice to say that Matt looks about 80 pounds in the picture and it's very comical. Ha ha.

Stupid Blogger.

Anyway! It was sad seeing her go, but it's not too bad because she is coming down in less than a month for a long weekend. She was able to find cheap enough fare that she could come down almost every month if she wanted. That's really cool because I miss seeing her, and in-laws just don't cut it sometimes when all you want is your mom.
Speaking of moms, I LOVE being one! I honestly didn't think I'd like it this much. Really, having a kid now is pretty much sealing the deal that any sort of "fun" life is over--no partying, no more being irresponsible, no more staying out until the wee hours of night. If getting married didn't stop all fun stuff, having a kid certainly does! If you want to be a responsible parent, that is. But you know what? I freaking LOVE being a mom! I have so much fun with Matt already and I can't wait until he can crawl/walk/talk. He is such a fun kid! I can't wait until I can hang out with him and run around with him and chase him and hike to cool places and bike and roller blade and go to the beach and build sand castles and bury him in the sand! I can't wait to teach him how to read and be confident in his abilities. He has two parents who really love each other and love him more than anything and he is going to have such a happy life! I don't care if I can't stay out late or go to stupid parties. I just want to hang out with Matt and have fun. No post-partum depression here!
Secretly, (not anymore I guess), Sean and I have been talking and we've come to the conclusion that we'd be really happy just having Matt and not any other kids. If something happens and I get pregnant, no problem. However, we're not going to actively try for any more. We feel like we lucked out so much with Matt and we don't want to push our luck. Plus, with two kids, you have to buy two of everything, work alone time with both kids, worry doubly about everything, spend twice as much money, etc. I realize in the end it's also double the happiness, but I think I can find all my gratification in one child. Sean and I are pretty relaxed parents, and having two kids to discipline and worry about will make us into two pretty stressed individuals. Kids spend most of their time and energy plotting how to manipulate their parents to get what they want, and with two kids, they use their time and energy plotting how to work together or against each other to get what they want. Children are devious! I'd rather just worry about one. Plus, I'm quick enough to catch onto one kid's tricks, but I'm not quite sure I'd be able to as quickly catch onto two or more kid's tricks.
I know opinions change, and probably in about a year or two my biological clock will start ringing and encouraging me that I really do want more kids. Who knows? But I'd be 100% happy with just Matt. He's great.
One more thing before I end this posting. I changed my Sprint plan. I looked online at my account and I didn't know I was getting charged $40 extra for stuff I didn't know I had and wasn't using! Lame! They were charging for Vision Pack (where you can send and receive pictures and videos and watch tv on your phone and stuff), voice command, and free minutes after 7. So I called and revamped my plan and got free minutes after 7 (for free instead of paying for it), kept my unlimited texting, and free roaming/long distance, etc, and now my plan went from $142 for two phones after taxes to $105. Plus, they give a 15% discount if you go into a store and show them your military ID and that brings my monthly bill to 89.25 after taxes. We get 700 anytime min, unlimited night and weekend, free mobile to mobile, unlimited texting, no roaming charges and free long distance, free caller ID/call waiting/three way calling. Very, very cool. To revamp my plan I had to do it with their current plan options, which meant I had to take a cut of 100 anytime minutes down from 800 and give up my 5 dollars for every extra 100 minutes I go over. I don't care about the minute cut, but it sucks about losing the $5 for every 100 min deal. However, I was looking at my usage and Sean and I use together an average of 300-400 minutes per billing period because most people we talk to are either on Sprint or we call after 7. So it's okay because we are saving an extraordinary amount of money. Especially since Sean is quitting his job, we'll have all those extra minutes he would normally use to call people he is delivering to. Yay! I'll still have to pay the super high cell phone bill this month, but starting February 12th I can finally start paying what I should have been paying to begin with. Maybe later if finances are looking good I'll pay for free minutes after 6. It's only $5 extra and may be worth it. We'll see.
Okay, I'm going to go watch 24 now which I missed last night thanks to a killer headache. I will post again soon, I PROMISE! Especially since I need to post some pictures.

baths are fun!

So today Matt pooped all over me and himself (including his socks--don't know how!). I went to clean him up and--of course--he pees all over himself. That was the last straw so I decided it was bath time-for both of us! This was the first time I had tried to bring him in the tub with me, and it was wonderful! He fell asleep floating in the water! But don't take my word for it:

Now is that cute or what? Next time, now that I know I can bathe him easily without drowning him, I will wear a bathing suit so there can be a lot more cuter pictures of bath time. Everything is going well besides bath time: I am going tomorrow to get WIC re-activated (I let my membership or whatever it is lapse) so we can get free formula for Matt. Sean's car has something wrong with its front axle that is going to cost over $300 and will keep it in the shop until monday. This month is hard and we're going to have to really damage our savings. But it's okay, because even though it is a hard month financially, it is a great month because Matt is growing by leaps and bounds and I FINALLY GET TO SEE MY MOM!!! YAY!!! Just 3 more days!!! To celebrate, here are some really cute pictures of Matt:

busy busy!

It seems like I'm always out doing something, so sorry for the lack of posting. Everything is great with Matt, Sean and I. We really are turning into a nice family. It's really strange...3 years ago I graduated HIGH SCHOOL! And now I have a career (2 if you count the marines) and a family and my own place. It's kind of scary to think about. Well hopefully since my life milestones seem to be coming early so will retirement. Yeah right! Anyway...
Matt is so cool and interesting now! He is really interactive and spends hours at a time awake and looking to interact. He is getting to where he'll do his version of a smile when I come to pay attention to him or pick him up. He puts his mouth in a happy cute O and squirms around. He effortlessly makes eye contact, and now not just with the person holding him but other people close by. He coos a lot and is ALWAYS kicking and moving his arms when he's awake. When I pull him into a sitting position from lying down (holding his hands) he can pull his head up. He is so strong and healthy and cute! And he does wake me up every 2 hours on the dot at night to eat but I don't care--he still only cries when he needs something. If his needs are met he will just look around and move, he doesn't cry. He likes to be tickled. He can't laugh yet but he likes the nerve stimulation and he'll do his smile equivalent and squirm around happily. He is a really happy baby. I wouldn't say calm because he is always moving, but very happy. Once he knows how he is going to be smiling all the time. Sean and I really lucked out. And you know what? I consumed super amounts of caffeine regularly while pregnant and my diet sucked. And I have a big healthy good baby boy. So there!
Okay, well, I have to go. I have a bunch of stuff to do today! Always busy, see? Then when I am done I still need to clean for my mom's arrival on Wednesday. I am SO excited!!! I can't wait to see her!!! And I can't wait for her to see Matt. I can, however, wait to have her see my carpets. They are so gross!

Aw

Matt is now officially not a new newborn anymore--his umbilical cord fell off last night! It was kind of creepy because while I was changing him around 12:30 I noticed, and I couldn't find it anywhere! Odd...
Also funny because babies are supposed to lose it around two weeks and he lost it pretty much on midnight on his 2nd week birthday!
So yes, looks like he will be getting a real bath soon which is awesome because he loves the water. Maybe Sean and I will do it tonight (and there will be lots of pictures).
Yesterday was a pretty busy day. Matt and I got off to a late start because I slept in (very tired from getting up every two hours on the dot). I drove to my base, Miramar, which is a good 2 hours away to return a piece of issued gear that just HAD to be in yesterday. I had originally volunteered to bring it so while I was down there I could visit Brenda and my aunt-in-law Karen, but I totally forgot it was my mother in law's birthday so I was in a rush and not able to visit anyone. Then I got lunch at In and Out (2 grilled cheese with tomatoes--yum) which took forever because it was super crowded, then stopped by work and showed Matt off to everyone. Then I had to pick up a cake, stop by my friend's house to pick something up, drive home, barely had enough time to feed/change him, then went to Target for the gift and met her for dinner. Then I went over to her place for cake and didn't get home until 9:30! Argh! I was pretty exhausted. Anyway, I'm going to go now--Matt is hungry and I must answer the call (cry?) of duty!

More images of Matt's life

Sean with Matt the night before he left for drill.

My dog Mai plotting to steal Matt's pacifier.

What pacifier? I don't care about pacifiers. I don't even know what a pacifier is!

Pink is the new blue.

Sean is gone

Sean is gone-off to drill. So it's Matt and I for the next three days and two nights. Joey is here and willing to help take care of Matt (and he does a good job), but it's not his kid and I don't count on him for help like I count on Sean. Matt woke up sooo many times last night! It's okay though, because each time he wakes up he is hungry or wet; it's not like he's crying randomly. Strange thing--I wake up now way before he starts crying. I'll wake up if he moves a certain way or makes a certain soft noise that I know means he is waking up and needs something. I still sleep through everything else like people talking and loud noises-it's just him that wakes me up! AHH! He is kicking off his blankets AGAIN! You know, I thought newborns LIKED to be swaddled! Hah! Not this one! He made it very clear in the womb that he wanted to get out and stretch his legs and arms and he is making it clear now! He does not like being swaddled! He'll tolerate it, sure, but if he's fussy you'd better not swaddle him! He won't calm down until he is 100% uncovered, then he looks around satisfied at a job well done and falls asleep, hands thrown over his head and his legs in strange skewed directions. Then of course, he wakes up crying because he's cold. And I put a blanket over him. And we repeat.
Anyway, he has a clogged tear duct and his left eye is all gross and gunky and crusted shut. He looks like a pirate! He can open it when I clean it, poor guy, or if he really tries he can open it and there's a bunch of stringy gunk reaching from the top to the bottom of his eye. Poor guy! I'm taking care of it.
I think I am going to give him a sponge bath today. His umbilical cord hasn't fallen off (and it grosses me out to think of it falling off ew), so I can't get him wet, but his skin needs to be washed. It's getting flaky from not having any old skin scrubbed (gently) away, and his hair is super greasy! I have wiped him with baby wipes and it makes it better but he needs real soap/shampoo. I have really nice Aveeno oatmeal hypoallergenic stuff. The only problem is I don't have a spray nozzle for any of the faucets in my apartment so I'll just have to do it the old fashioned way and pour cups of water over him to rinse. I hope I don't get any up his nose! Even if I do, he won't remember :-P
Okay, going to go get dressed now. Not much to do today but I need to get out of the house and do something! But I can't go in my bathrobe (unless my name is Arthur Dent of course).

Squishy Pumpkin Pie

Happy New Year! I hope this year is good--it certainly started off well. I held Matt in my arms and kissed Sean, and tried to think of some good resolutions. I thought first, a good resolution would be to successfully balance working full time, being a good mom and being a wife (and a person too somewhere in there). Then I realized that I really don't have a choice, I don't have an option to fail. So last night I weighed myself and I lost 20 lbs! Wow! Nothing like that pregnancy diet. So, losing weight (supposedly the most common resolution) isn't on my list. Getting back into shape will be! I didn't think that would be a problem, but since they sliced through my ab muscles, I'll actually have to make a good effort to get back into shape. Again, no choice there, I go back to Marine Corps drill in March or April. By then I have to be able to run 3 miles in less than 30 min (which isn't that bad unless you haven't run for over a year and you sucked at it to begin with anyway), do a flexed arm hang for 70 seconds and 100 crunches in under 2 minutes. The running and crunches are going to suck! Right now it hurts just to get off the couch.
So...I guess my resolution is to try my hardest and not slack off in life and try to be the best I can be! Going to go now, just fed and changed Matt and am going now to pick up the photos I ordered online :-) I have to have SOMETHING concrete for the album!

Supply > Demand

So here's some pictures from my camera:

This is Matt today, sleeping in his bassinet after my last posting. Isn't he cute?

Friday at the clinic after being fed--he's so sleepy and happy!

Same place, same time as above :-)

Okay, again, same deal--he is just too cute and photogenic!

Sean with Matt soon after we came home. Amazing-observe a rare moment in time when Matt has TWO socks on his feet!

And this is--guess who--in the hospital bassinet a couple of days after being born.

Okay so, more coming soon! Here are some links to photos online:

http://www2.snapfish.com/share/p=863251167103711691/l=227113058/g=83494534/otsc=SYE/otsi=SALB

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5a7LbNF1q0

http://picasaweb.google.com/brendahol/MatthewSBirth

Yay!

I feel wonderful! I'm feeling really great today--even though today is Sean's first day of work since Matt's birth and even though last night I have had to get up the most times since he has been born to change/feed/change him. Now that the stress of breastfeeding is gone I feel like a new person! I can take him places, spend quality time with him, walk around with him and talk to him and show him things because it's ok if he decides he's hungry! Ah...today has just been great. I went to Sean's work and we got pizza and soda (my appetite is back!), then went to PetSmart to get lizard food, then went grocery shopping! Well, light grocery shopping. It felt so nice to be up and about! We came back and I changed/fed/burped Matt and then I just walked around with him talking. The entire time he was so happy and just looking at me in the eyes like everything I said was really meaningful. (which it wasn't--mostly random stuff and poo puns). Wow...see THIS is what motherhood is supposed to feel like! I'm doing well on alternating breast milk feedings and formula and he is taking to it well. He is eating so much! He went from eating just over 1 oz per feeding to 3 oz! Man, I love bottle feeding because those extra 2 oz is now another 5-10 minutes that we can just be in our own little world together in happiness, rather than another 5-10 minutes of awful pain and crying.
So now he is just hanging out in his bassinet. I think I will hold him some more until he falls asleep--it must be boring in there! So, I'll post later and HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

ouch! babies hurt!

so...I am going to have to stop breastfeeding and just pump and supplement with formula. My breast milk is bloody! It really, really hurts to breastfeed and neither him nor I are good at it. It is the unhappiest time of day for both of us. When I first fed him expressed breast milk from a bottle, that was the first time since birth that we were able to look into each others eyes and have a really nice bonding experience. I have struggled with the decision for a couple of days, but this morning when I went to pump and my milk was red with blood, I decided that this wasn't right for either of us. Hey--he'll still be getting my milk, just supplemented. I am not making enough anyway--he is always hungry and I can't pump enough. He eats so much! So...at first I was really worried and thought that would mean I was a bad mom and copping out and denying him the experience of breastfeeding...but I realized that it was getting to the point that I wasn't even holding him except to feed him and put him to bed. The feeding time was so terrible I was afraid that if I held him he might be hungry. And honestly--that's not healthy. This morning I fed him by bottle and actually wanted to carry him around and show him things and talk to him because I wasn't afraid of making him hungry.
So anyway, last night was fun. He went through a ton of diapers and outfits and feedings. Heh...one time we took off his diaper to change him and he peed all over his face while crying. I felt bad for him...but it was pretty funny. Poor guy!
So yes...I am sure some people would tell me I am being a bad mom for not trying harder to breastfeed, but too bad! Bloody breast milk can't be good for him (well--high iron), and when we're both crying trying to breastfeed, it's not a good experience. And yes, I have seen lactation specialists...it all seems so easy when I am there but once I get home it's back to the angry nipple chomping and screaming.
Anyway, that's about it. I'm getting my staples out on Tuesday--yay! I am numb in an area above them, so I'll have to make sure to ask the doctor about that. I can kind of feel pressure...so maybe sensation will eventually come back.
Okay, I'll post later!

Matt has entered the building!

Okay, well, I am sure you guys all know by the comments left on my last posting that Matt is here! (plus at my absence of posts). He is so perfect! The umbilical cord was wrapped twice around his neck and they had to do a c-section. Hey, it wasn't my first choice but the feeling of the horrible painful contractions fading into nothingness was rather wonderful. I only have a small incision that even my lo-rise bikini underwear covers.

He was 8 lbs, 3 ounces, and 19 and 1/2 inches long. He has MY hair! For some reason, that was the strangest part. I only got to see him for a few seconds after he was born, and because my arms were strapped down I could only nuzzle him and kiss him and tell him I love him. I didn't get to see him for almost three hours! I did see photos of him and it was really unreal. It only was real when I finally got to hold him. He was crying and crying and when I picked him up and talked to him he quieted down immediately and looked me in the eyes--THAT'S when it became real.
Anyway, now I am home. I got released early from the hospital because I was doing so well after the c-section. Today marks 5 days after I gave birth to Matthew, and I am not in much pain and I am walking around mostly okay. I still can't lift anything, but I'm pretty mobile. Ooo--and I made a point of putting on normal clothes today, even though the shirt is going to come off soon anyway for breastfeeding.
Ah, breastfeeding. It really isn't coming naturally for either of us. Now he will at least latch on and it will go okay, but it's been and still is a struggle. Plus, it's insanely painful. I dread feeding time. But, I know it'll get better once him and I really get the hang of it.

He is a VERY active baby--when they took him out of me and put him in the incubator he was rolling around and kicking and punching--they had to put something underneath one side so it was inclined so he couldn't roll so much. He is super alert and takes a great interest in his surroundings even though I know he can't see them that clearly. He will stare at you...well me...in the eyes for such long periods of time. It's really precious.
As far as I can tell he is on schedule development-wise. There is a very specific pattern of pooping that newborns are supposed to follow, and he's on track. Yay! I never thought I could be so thrilled about stuff like that. Right now he is sound asleep in his bassinet after a nice long feeding. He did stay awake for a good half hour afterwards, just looking around at stuff. I wonder if he is bored sometimes, but then I remember that literally EVERYTHING is new to him.
Anyway, I am hungry and don't have much time until he is hungry again. There's lots more to talk about like who visited and what the hospital was like and such, but it's going to have to wait.


There are many, many more pictures, but these are all my limited time has to offer right now. Thank you everyone for your support!

=Ouch

Cat on mouse again. Anyway this is going to be short. I am having contractions and they hurt so, so bad. I had a couple yesterday but they weren't this bad and they stopped after a while. I have tried everything to make these ones go away but they keep coming. I think I might be in labor--but whether or not the labor is real, these stupid contractions are real. I can't talk/walk through them...or type...there just had another. That one wasn't too bad. Some of them are mostly back pain, some mostly uterine, some both. I'm not bothering to count them yet--they're about 10 min apart. Actually the really really bad ones are 10 min apart with smaller ones in between. This sucks! But, I'm still glad that labor has possibly arrived. These woke me up out of my sleep. (typing because everyone else is sleeping and it keeps me occupied). I was having this dream that I was in WoW (World of Warcraft) and switching from Hoarde to Alliance doing Christmas lights (?????), and each time I'd switch I'd wake up with horrible pain (a contraction), then fall back asleep. Yes, I woke Sean up, but...crap...ouch. Ok that was another. They hurt so badly I feel sick. I am going to go--I'll post again if they go away (I swear to everything holy if I go through this pain and I'm not in real labor I am going to go postal!). If they don't go away...you'll be getting a call!

My Cat Does Not Enjoy Me Blogging

He can't decide whether to stand in front of the monitor, walk on the keyboard or lay on the mouse. Tough choice! Right now he is laying on the mouse.
Anyway, no labor.
Anyway, I cleaned the gross couch today. I scrubbed it by hand with a scrub brush using hot water and detergent then sucked it up with my half-working upholstery cleaner. (Half working because it won't clean anything but it'll suck up the yucky water). It was SO GROSS! So much black water came up. Mixing many people and 4 animals and a white couch really, really doesn't mesh well in my book. Blah. It still looks yucky, but at least not to the point where it acts as a neighborhood crime deterrent.
Anyway, just a short post to let everyone know that absolutely nothing is going on. And to let you know that when everyone visits they will have a nice clean couch to sit on.

Matt's Due Date!

Can it technically still be called a due date if he doesn't arrive? I mean, as of this post, he has 40 more minutes to come, but something tells me he won't :-). I had a doctor's appointment today, again. They hooked me up to a fetal monitor to perform what is called a "non-stress test". They check fetal heartbeat, movements and contractions for regularity and signs of stress. He is doing well, very healthy and wonderful. I am not dilated any more, however I am having contractions every 6-7 minutes. Fake ones, of course. The doctor said it was my body getting prepared for labor (really? wow!). Another doctor saw me today and asked if I had been drinking raspberry leaf tea. I said yup, tons of it, and it's not doing anything. He seemed very surprised and just kept repeating things like "Really? Wow! And this is raspberry LEAF tea? Wow...and it's not doing anything? Wow. Huh. I guess your uterus must not be sensitive to the chemicals in it. Wow..." Yeah, yeah. Thanks for rubbing it in! Anyway, they said if I hadn't gone into labor by Tuesday (my next appointment), they would induce me. So, either way, less than a week until I can hold Matt and everyone can meet him!!!
Today was pretty uneventful. Sean and I hung out at his mom's house all day, watching movies and eating. Had a gardenburger for lunch and yummy sushi for dinner. Mmm. With lots of wasabe. Yeah, Matt didn't care, the massive amounts of wasabe didn't faze him one bit. Pretty much just been hanging out and playing WoW....waiting for the onset of labor!!!

s'now snow like mountian snow

So after my rather disappointing doctor's appointment, we all decided we would cheer up and go up the nearest mountain and see the snow.

We ate at a nice home style cooking cafe (the Idyllwild Cafe to be exact). I got some delicious waffles and hash browns, and Sean and Joey got some yummy stuff too. They close at 2! Everyplace there closes at 2!!!

It's a small town, kind of artsy rich place that tries really, really hard to look innocent mountain town-ish even though you know everyone up there is rich. (By the way, if you look closely at the above picture, that IS a dead snowball on my back. It's okay. I got revenge.)

There was a cool organic foods store and I got some raspberry leaf tea which I had read can trigger contractions and my OB/GYN recommended it today. It tastes very strange, certainly not (let me go get the box) "a robust, full bodied flavor reminiscent of fine black tea".

Yeah, reminiscent if you're on crack! I let two teabags steep for 10 minutes in a small teapot, poured myself a mug and put one of the teabags in there to steep more. After 5 more minutes I took a sip and it tasted like really watered down cheap chamomile tea...kind of. Anyhow the flavor certainly isn't "robust". Perhaps compared to...no....even tap water has a more robust flavor (especially my tap water here in Hemet...).


Anyhow, here's us in the snow. Stop laughing all you New Englanders! Snow is rare here! Didn't get any pictures of the town--just picture a bunch of wooden bungalow-type shops that boast of organic food and art galleries. And a quaint wooden liquor store. Of course.

YOU SHALL NOT PASS!!!

So says the cervix. I KNOW God is making me wait specifically because he knows I am an impatient person. I know it! I'll probably have a 12 month long pregnancy. He's never, EVER coming out until I accept that he is never ever coming out then maybe he will. Okay...deep breath.
So, went to my appointment today, I am still at the same dilation, his head is still in the same place, the Earth is still rotating around the sun, etc. I asked about possible induction on my due date and she said no, that it's their policy to make the mother suffer--I mean--wait until a week after the due date to consider induction, including manually breaking my water. So I have another appointment on Friday, but I think that's just a non-stress test which will monitor the heartbeat and movements and analyze them. They'll probably check me for dilation too. Then I will go in again on Tuesday. And again and again, while they all marvel about how long my pregnancy is and how they never thought a baby could get so big. I wonder if I can enroll for preschool? Any interactive classes where maybe I could teach him shapes by pressing them against my belly. Then he will grow up and be famous for having the first marriage--IN THE WOMB! Because he's never, EVER coming out!
(secretly hoping maybe reverse psychology will work some voodoo magic and I'll go into labor tonight)
Which won't happen, of course. But wouldn't it be nice?

better now

I feel better now, I've been taking it easy and eating good food. I'm looking forward to my doctor's appointment tomorrow. If I am dilated some more then I may just wait for labor to start naturally, but I don't think I am so I am really going to beg for them to induce me on Friday. I know they usually don't like to do it until you're a week or so overdue because they don't want to put unnecessary drugs in your system. But reading up on it, I think since I am already dilated/effaced they shouldn't have a problem with at least breaking my water or what they call "stripping the membranes". I shouldn't need drugs to get labor started at this point--just my water to break.
BUT--we'll see what the doctor says because that's most important. And I am still going on long walks and trying to induce labor safely and naturally. :-)
So now my week has become so dull that I look forward obsessively to my doctor's appointment each day. How sad!
Okay, going to go now, I'm at my mother-in-laws waiting for the appraiser to come because she is at work. I'll post about the doctor's appointment tomorrow!

sick?!

I feel so sick this morning! I woke up at 7 and haven't been able to sleep since. I feel super, super nauseous, and laying down only makes it worse! I am really trying to drink water, but that isn't going so well. I don't want to puke but my body sure does! Last night I had diarrhea pretty bad which is really unusual because before I got pregnant I NEVER got it. The times I got it even a little bit (only having to go one time) I could count on one hand. Being pregnant sucks. Now I get nausea, diarrhea, heartburn...LAME! I guess this morning Matt must have been laying on my stomach or something because laying down usually helps but right now the only thing helping is me being upright. :-( I feel like crap :-(.
Anyway, I found out Sean doesn't have to go back to school until January (winter break) and his boss gave him until the 27th off from work! So now would be a really, REALLY conveinant time to give birth. If I am late, Sean won't be able to take more time off (and we couldn't afford it anyway). I am wondering if I can get induced on my due date. I am going to talk to my doctor about it on wednesday when I go in for my appointment. It's not like I don't have people willing to help, it would just be nice to get some family bonding in and figure stuff out as new parents.
Blah...still sick. I just want to curl up in bed and not get up...except for the fact I can't! Okay, I am going to go attempt to drink some water...I am sure some of this nausea is caused by dehydration from the diarrhea. >:-(

Name Games

When I told Sean I had decided on the name, he said he really didn't care anymore and whatever I want to do with the last names is fine (and he meant it, he wasn't being dramatic). Maybe I will go with Holloway-Purvis...it seems to go smoother. Oh well, anyway he is definatly giving me lots of time to think about it!